Tuesday, August 3, 2010

The Conversion Difference

We have a saying around our organization in offices running from coast to coast and around the world. One hears it periodically. Just last week my boss used it at a meeting of senior leadership. The saying refers to long-term problem employees and goes like this: s/he does not have 15 (10, 20, etc.) years of experience but rather one year 15 (10, 20, etc.) times.

It is my saying, and I am always a bit startled when I hear it. It has incredible staying power. Worse, everyone attributes it to me. Sigh! Even the newer generation of managers use it, and when they meet me, they say, "Oh, we know you; you are the one who said...."

That happened more than 20 (!) years ago, on my first stint of duty at our organization. I left somewhat after that for 13 years of international consulting and returned less than five years ago. At the time, those twenty years earlier, I had been experiencing difficulty convincing an elderly and not very talented or effective employee to introduce changes to the way she did her job. I pushed and pushed. Finally, exasperated, she snapped at me, "Who are YOU to tell ME how to do my job? I have 23 years of experience!"

With my barely ten years of management experience, only two of it in our organization, I must have appeared to be a smart-aleck young whippersnapper to whom she had no intention of listening. It was that negative comparison, I guess, that made me do it. The need to be in control, the need to feel competent and important, and all those things that young managers want to feel impelled me forward with no regard for anything except my goal, my control, my projects, my reputation, and the changes I wanted. And so, without thinking, I shot back what I thought was a cute comeback, "No, dear, you have one year of experience 23 times."

I realized that I had overstepped my bounds, making a cruel joke at her expense, when her eyes welled with tears. She quickly left my office to hide them. The next day she presented me with her retirement papers. Although I had a small stab of guilt at the time, I also felt incredible relief: lady retires, problem disappears.

Everyone congratulated me on "eliminating" a troublesome employee. Most people considered my cute little comeback to be rather clever, and soon both employees, who had heard it from the lady, and other managers, who heard it from each other, were heard repeating it in the hallways and at meetings. My reputation increased, and I became the darling of some management sets.

I was shocked to find out how persistent that saying had become when I returned. In fact, several new employees, not here when I first came back, asked me if it were true that I was the source of this saying. Yes, I told them, it was, unfortunately, true. Then, at one of my first leadership development sessions with my managers, one of them asked me the same question, and I answered in the same way, "Yes, unfortunately, it is true."

"Why do you say 'unfortunately'?" he asked. "It is insightful and clever and really quite funny..."

He wanted to go on praising me for this "great" expression which all managers seem to have adopted. I stopped him. "It is cruel," I answered. "We can manage more effectively with kindness than with cruelty."

So what had happened in the intervening years? God had intervened. While I was still me in terms of knowledge, skills, and abilities, my heart had changed; my thinking had changed; my very soul had changed. Post-conversion, doing things right became meaningless; doing the right thing became meaningful. Taking care of business became less meaningful; taking care of God's people became more meaningful -- and in every one of my employees I could see the seed of God. I began to seek the approval of my supervisors far less and the approval of God far more until all that mattered was the approval and will of God.

As a result, I introduced the concept of servant leadership. I retired the "I" and "my" of earlier years and began working for my employees, listening to them, asking their opinions, providing support, working together for one goal, none of us more important than the other. The senior and junior managers followed suit. Pretty soon we had developed an upside-down organization where kindness trumps cruelty and problems are solved with prayer. Pretty soon I did not have to worry about whether someone had only one year of experience multiple times because everyone was willing to work together and to help each other; teamwork has multiplied everyone's years of experience by tenfold.

Now, instead of being afraid of me, employees come charging through my open door, asking for advice or help or a hug. Instead of tears in their eyes, I see smiles on their faces. Now, every morning I ask God to let His love leak out through me and splash out onto those with whom I come into contact. Now, my employees constantly try to protect me; they like being splashed with love and want to make sure that I stay around to keep it coming.

So, when my boss used that old expression the other day, a shock ran through me. It was like having a mirror held up to my then-soul, and I did not like what I saw. Fortunately, with conversion, we get not only a new soul but also a new mirror.

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