Monday Morning Meditation #67: Accept Reproof

This week I finished the psalms. It was with some regret that I left them behind. They made for such beautiful reading. I will, for certain, return to them as often as I can. Moving on to Proverbs, I am finding these verses equally inspiring, but for different reasons. (And while we are talking about inspiring things, let me mention that I am looking forward to getting up early Tuesday morning for the winter solstice when the light from the rising sun streams through the church window onto the tabernacle which floods it down the center aisle, as you can see in the picture on the left. It only happens once a year, but when it does, it is splendid, something not to be missed.

I could probably have stopped with the first verse of Proverbs 1 and found something worth reflecting upon in each subsequent verse. However, I marched forward through them until I found a verse which I could not pass by: Proverbs 12: 1, which reads:

Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge,
But he who hates reproof is stupid.

Reading: Proverbs 12

Meditation: I suppose no one really likes to be reproved. We all have that little (sometimes large) ego that puts up a defensive barrier when we find any reproving troops headed our way. Even otherwise self-confident people can become defensive when directly presented with mistakes they have made, especially when they know better and especially if those mistakes are a result of an ego-laced decision. I am currently working through such a decision, actually a series of such decisions, with one of the senior managers who works for me. An ego investment in these decisions has led him along a path away from servant leadership, in which he truly does believe, to a highly autocratic approach with one specific employee, which he does not see but is clear to her and to me. Part of his unwillingness to discuss the situation as openly as necessary to ameliorate the situation and bring it to a good close is his need to impress her, which he is doing but in the opposite manner than he wishes, and part of his unwillingness is the inability to admit that he could be so mistaken in his decisions and actions. I have had to reprove him for some of the latter, and the minute I have attempted to do so, up springs that defensive barrier, seemingly instantaneously, like a pop-up tent, preventing me from raining on his intentions.

I would like to tell him, as I have told others before him, to throw his ego into the nearest trash car because all it is doing is sullying him and his reputation. He will need to bathe in a good deal of humility to clean up. I dearly hope that he will be able to do that.

I understand. Perfectly. I don't like to be reproved, either, and it has taken me years and effort to learn to thank those willing to reprove me. Fr. E is one of those willing to do that -- for everyone. He is, you could say, the town reprover. It tickles me when I see him taking someone to task for improper behavior (quite often he will keep Doah in line in this way), whether or not that person is a member of our parish. (Most of our little town belongs to our parish, and Fr. E seems to scoop up the rest just in daily living.)

I suppose, too, that fear of reproval keeps some folks away from confession. I imagine, in many cases, it is a matter of the self reproving itself, and that, too, us uncomfortable to an ego. As I have said before, "Just throw into the trash can; it is not needed." I do that -- and then later in the day I find myself wanting it for some reason and go and pull it out. I wonder how many others do that?

Contemplation: That is far as I can go with you this Monday morning. I now retire to private prayer to repent those times in which I have not accepted deserved reproval, to praise God for the innovative ways in which He sends reproval my way through others, to thank God for caring enough to want to reprove me, and to ask God to keep on correcting me when I need correction so that I may grow closer to Him and closer to the way in which He would want me to be. Then I will move on to contemplation, my favorite part of the day, letting God take over the direction in which my relationship with Him moves.

I will leave you now to your prayer and contemplation. First, though, I would like to bring to your attention a Monday morning prayer post that you might enjoy:

Fr. Austin Fleming, priest of the Archdiocese of Boston and pastor in Concord, Massachusetts, posts a prayer each Monday morning that he calls "Monday Morning Offering." I enjoy his prayers very much. I think you also will find them inspirational. He has graciously given me permission to include a link to his blog on my Monday Morning Meditation posts. (During the week, he also posts great homilies and other thoughtful discussions. I enjoy reading those, too, as do readers of this blog who have taken the stroll over to his blog.)

For additional inspiration throughout the week, I would point out two sets of blogs: (1) the list of devotional blogs on my sidebar and (2) my blogroll, where I am following a number of inspirational priests and writers about spiritual matters. I learn so very much from all these people. I highly recommend them to you.