Sunday, February 13, 2011

Help! Please, help!

For more Spiritual Sunday posts, I recommend that you wander over to the website of Charlotte and Ginger, who host the Spiritual Sunday meme.

I had planned to post something lighter and more spiritual, a post from the past, for Spiritual Sunday as I usually do -- until I came home from Mass (Saturday Vigil).

At Mass, the diocese’s lawyer read us a letter from our bishop. Our beloved, kind, compassionate, fun-loving, help-all-harm-none priest, who has been with us for 16 years, has been accused in two instances of sexual abuse.

One case is 20 years old. The diocese found the person to be credible. (Credible does not mean true; rather, it means that the accuser seems believable. As we all know, there are believable liars around and people deluded by false memories who come across as believable. The literature on false memories is now vast.)

Another person jumped on the bandwagon, claiming a recent instance of abuse. That was found to be a false accusation.

The lawyer asked anyone who would like to consult her about their own abuse by our priest to do so outside after Mass. I realize that the diocese has to be open to the possibility of other instances of abuse, but this woman (lawyer) seemed to be encouraging people to think through their pasts and invent accusations. Feeding frenzy and floating dollars are images that come immediately to mind.

The 20-year-old accusation is going to trial and, we were told, to Rome. The priest has been arrested. I don’t know if he has access to communication with anyone. I sent him a note on FB and on his email account and will have to wait to see if he does or can respond. Nothing so far, and I notice that the most recent post, which might possibly have revealed something about his whereabouts, has been taken down. (I only noticed that because I had left a comment upon which he had commented.) I don't know whether communicating with him is good or bad at this point, i.e. what will help him and what will hurt him.

No one I have talked to in the parish believes that he could possibly have done this. We do believe that someone is either suffering from a false memory or out for money. I had sharp words with the diocese lawyer who seems all about protecting the image of the diocese and not at all about protecting the priest. I was abused as a child and would not dream of supporting someone who would do such a thing. I feel with great certainty, however, that our priest has been wrongly accused, and almost always my intuition is accurate. This is the second person to be accused, seemingly falsely, in our diocese. The first one, a couple of years ago in a different parish, seemed to be a result of a grudge. Although nothing has been proved yet, he is still not back in his parish; a civil case has been pending for more than two years. We would not like to see our priest follow the same path but realize that may be unavoidable. What we hope to avoid is the bishop selling out the priest for the public perception of the diocese. It seems that bishops have made a u-turn, instead of a course correction, since the days of burying everything under the closest carpet.

Our parish stands ready to help our priest in any way possible, emotionally, legally, and financially. I wonder if any of readers have experience with this and/or thoughts about how to help. I have connections with good lawyers, but I am told by the diocesan lawyer that our priest has a canon lawyer and a civil lawyer (hopefully, good ones); I am good at organizing and rallying people; I can raise money; I know how to write. Again, I don't know what will help and what will harm. The Opus bono sacerdotii site and These Stone Walls have both helped me understand the situation -- and its seriousness -- better, and, wonderfully, OBS helps priests in trouble, especially ones who fall into what has become the Salem witch hunt of the 21st century.

Certainly, we will be praying for our priest, but God also needs hands and activists to help. We are ready, but we don’t know what steps to take.

Standing by for suggestions...

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