Spiritual Sunday #24: No Words Needed

For more Spiritual Sunday posts, I recommend that you wander over to the website of Charlotte and Ginger, who host the Spiritual Sunday meme.

Because I do not blog on Sundays -- keeping it as the sabbath, a practice started by Fr. Christian Mathis (Blessed Is the Kingdom) -- I usually use older posts (forgotten perhaps but hopefully still interesting) from one or another of my blogs that seem appropriate for this meme. This week, however, one of my colleagues shared a picture, source unknown (otherwise I would give credit), which is a post all by itself. Would you agree that any words would just take away from the message and feel of this picture?



Peace to all! Prayers for all -- always!

Thankful Thursday #: Peaceful Days

This week I have had many reasons to be thankful, so, leaving aside the past weekend, which I will chronicle in tomorrow's Quick Takes -- it was so full that the weekend adventures will occupy all seven slots -- let me list the ones that came to mind today.

Today, by the way, was a great day. I played hooky from work and spent the day at the St. Francis Retreat Center at the Day of Recollection that the retreat center staff puts on for Lenten Wednesdays, then in the evening managed to carve out time both for the Bible Study class and for the Penance service at Old Mission, double attendance being possible because our class went as a whole to confession, which took a little longer than usual because there were only two priests for a surprisingly large number of people who showed up. I was among the last in line, but it was worth the wait, and the music that played while we were waiting shaped our emotions into the needed tenor.

Perhaps, then, I will start with today's retreat center activities. Since I try to attend the days of recollection, whether on Lenten Wednesdays or First Fridays, in any given year being lucky enough to make about 30% of them, I have come to know the regular attendees over time pretty well. The core group is a like a gathering of friends. Today was no different. I sat with two people from my prayer group who also form part of the core group for the retreat center activities. Both are retired, so they are more regular than I am. One of them sat next to me during the morning session and the ensuing Mass. During the Mass, at which we were joined in the chapel by about 30 friars who were attending a meeting of some sort at the retreat center, the presence of God simply pervaded the entire chapel. I felt it very strongly. Knowing that often the friend who was sitting beside me does not feel God's presence as intensely as I do, I said a silent prayer, asking that she might also be aware of God's presence. After the Mass was over, she looked visibly moved. I asked her if she had felt a strong sense of God's presence as I had, and she said, "Yes, and especially when you touched me" during the kiss of peace. I am thankful for the answer to that prayer, as well as thankful for something that did not happen. During the morning, there was a sighting of Fr. Terry, my de facto spiritual advisor for the past three years and the former director who recently (as in two months ago) left the center for another position, following a transfer of functions at the center by the Franciscan regional order (to whose intentions and logic I can never see rhyme nor reason). He apparently was attending the meeting of friars. I glimpsed him briefly at Mass, but I was unable to make my way through the crowd to say hello before he disappeared. I miss him very much, and I pray for him as often as I can. (He is not young: 80+.) I was disappointed, of course, that I came so close, yet missed him, but not as much as I would have been had not a special book fallen into my hands recently. In this book, Abandonment to Divine Providence, deCaussade wrote, "When God lives in the soul, it has nothing left of self but only that which the spirit which actuates it imparts to it at each moment...often enough it is even deprived of a regular director, for God allows it no other support than that which He gives it Himself." I am extraordinarily grateful that this book popped into my hands at just the right moment in my life (as so much seems to do these days).

Yesterday, I had to go into work late because I had to pick up a good-bye mug for one of our administrative assistants whose last day was yesterday. (It was good that I took the time to get it because I could tell from the expression on her face when I presented it at the good-bye luncheon that she had expected it.) Donnie designs the mugs, and a local novelty shop makes them. They read "Bon voyage. Thanks for making Division C a better place." They also have the employee's name on the cup. They seem to be treasured by the departing employees, and I would not dare to forget one. With the mug carefully placed on the floor in the back seat, I headed to work only to be stopped by a rooster. Roosters have the right of way, legally, in San Ignatio, and this one seemed confused. He was not crossing the street, as the joke goes, to get to the other side. He just stood in front of me, leaving me no room on either left or right to get around him without his potentially running under my tires. I waited, and waited, and waited. I waited long enough to miss the meeting that I had promised to catch the tail end of. (The organizer told me it was the most unique excuse/justification he had ever heard! Held up by a rooster!) The longer I waited, the slower the day became and the calmer I became. I am very thankful to that rooster and the slow start to the day because I arrived in a "slow" frame of my mind, and the whole day was stress-free. I hope I can repeat that often. (Well, maybe without the rooster!)

I am very thankful for our cats, Murjan (Arabic: coral - an immigrant from Jordan, he has a white coral body and a red coral markings), Intrepid (another Jordanian), and Simone (a local feral cat whom I tamed). They bring us such pleasure. Murjan is an especially social cat and misses me when I am away. Since we returned Sunday night from a weekend in Los Angeles, preceded by my week in Maryland, Murjan has not left my side. Of course, he began by jumping onto the kitchen table and begging for treats (his manners are not the best in that respect), but once he had inhaled those in 2-3 big bites, he jumped onto the couch beside me and nothing would entice him away. It has been that way all week; if I get up to do something, he follows and sits beside me until I come back to some place more comfortable, where he then lies down.

I could include more things about which to be thankful. A supervisor who came and presented a plaque with the names of my employees who had been recognized for service to the organization and distinguished performance; in the process, she made everyone, including me, feel valued. My prayer group met at my house on Monday evening and watched China Cry (I recommend it), during and after which we all cried -- and then ate some berries and cream. On Monday, I was able to have a senior staff meeting; everyone was back for the first time in weeks, including one supervisor who had safely returned from Afghanistan. Indeed, I could go on. It has been one of those weeks that makes up for the difficult ones. A week permeated by an attitude of gratitude because the days themselves have been resplendent with reasons to say thank you to colleagues, friends, God.

More information about the Thankful Thursday meme can be found at the website of Grace Alone.

Sister M

Yesterday, when I blogged about being a broken vessel, I mentioned how easy it is to fall into the trap of comparing oneself with others, and some readers commented on how I am not the only one who does that, agreeing that we should not although sometimes there are people who can be models for us in their holiness.

For me, there is indeed one: Sister Maria. I am fortunate to have come to know Sister quite well. She lives in the Franciscan Sisters of Atonement convent in the woods overlooking the valley (quite a view from their living room) next to our parish offices and is the nun in charge of keeping everything in order there, something she is very good at. Like most of my other friends, and I do consider Sister a friend, she is considerably older than me: mid-seventies. Sister comes regularly to the prayer group and Bible study group to which I belong, and I benefit from her experience and wisdom. She also teaches catechism, as do I, so I see her (actually, I room with her) at the religious education conferences that we attend for our continued faith formation.

In addition to being a model for me in all her quiet ways, Sister, because of her accepting nature, is the one person in whom I have confided nearly all of my spiritual experiences for which I need greater understanding: the times that Evil seems to attack, the miraculous help and clearly God-sent healings that enter my life from time to time, understanding of prayer (especially contemplation which was my entry point into Catholicism -- Sister says I started backwards from most, who begin with ordinary prayer and work through meditation into contemplation whereas I was hit on the head and surrounded by the presence of God for two full weeks and had to learn later, through RCIA, how to pray the ordinary types of prayer such as thanksgiving and repentance), and more.

The "more" includes those early days when an interim diocesan priest who took over our RCIA group from Fr. Barry, visiting priest and director of St. Francis Retreat Center, waved aside any of my spiritual sensations and interventions as "nonsense." While Fr. Barry was and is always available to me, God bless him, he has been highly occupied with rebuilding the retreat center that had burned down. Valuing his time, I go to him only with the thorny issues. Over 80 years old and having already celebrated 50 years of Franciscan priesthood, he is never surprised -- he has seen it all in his 50+ years of ministry in the Franciscan tradition. Nor does he make me feel awkward or embarrassed. He understands, accepts, and gently guides in a way that has made him my de facto spiritual advisor.

Still, because of the demands on Fr. Barry's time and the abundance of my spiritual encounters and experiences, it is Sister Maria to whom I generally go for interpretation. She not only has time and wisdom for me, but like a true friend and counselor, when she sees that I need reproving, she does not hesitate to speak out. In some difficult moments, when I have not understood what it is God is trying to tell me, she has taken me into the chapel and prayed together with me. Now, there is a true friend! You can probably tell that I love Sister very much. I am highly grateful to God that He has not only surrounded me with priests, each of which has brought something special into my life, but also that He put me in Sister's path and led her to scoop me up and take me along for frequent intervals of her journey. Sometimes she is gone for long periods of time, taking care of God's business and her own ailing sisters, but other times we get long moments together through local religious social events which we attend in tandem with other friends. In addition, a triad of Sr. M, Robert (a spiritual director), and I (the most unlikely of choices except for my extroversion) share responsibility for the leadership of our local prayer group.

Sister M is the most humble person I know and, as a Franciscan and true servant of God, would be quite surprised that I would think of her as a model. Now, if I, in my Franciscan walk as an SFO candidate, could only come close to that! My hope and goal is to some day come close enough to earn the right to profess in the third order. (Regulation-wise, I could have done it already. Spiritually, I need more study and greater humility. And, like most people, I need more time with God.)

God has blessed me beyond anything I have deserved, and my relationship with Sr. M is one of those blessings. May all of you be blessed with someone in your life like my friend, de facto counselor, and model, Sister M, beloved by many, not just by me.